Facts About The Art Of Influence Your Success Obtainable Or Sustainable How To Accelerate Your Personal Success Success On Purpose
All of us could work on our skills in influencing others – whether it is within a company, a family, or a group of friends. Within the corporate world, influence is a power that you can control with your supervisor, upper management, customers, and co-workers.
Don’t confuse influencing, with the art of “kissing up;” it’s not the same thing.
Livia, the wife of Octavian (Caesar Augustus), and mother of Tiberius, was one of the most influential people in Rome. She is not known for kissing up, but she is historically remembered as one of the most powerful Romans of her time.
Some people hold more power by influencing, than those who seem to be in power. Many of us have seen an administrative assistant, who ran a department, or an entire company.
So how do you start developing the art of influence? One of the best ways to start is to establish a reputation of integrity. Therefore, you should not engage in any “back biting,” as it always takes away from your credibility. It may be tempting to jump on the “band wagon,” and express a negative opinion about a third party, but it will not develop your ability to influence the person who is not present.
As a matter of fact, gossip and slander will destroy your honor, with all parties concerned. Even perceived allies will question your trustworthiness, when you engage in backbiting. True alliances are founded on loyalty, dependability, and straight forwardness. The bottom line is: You must be seen as a foundation of integrity, in order to be influential within a group.
The next most valuable ingredient is to be sincerely interested in helping others, and show your interest in them. How well you relate to the needs of others, will develop entire networks, and bonds that last.
Here is a personal story about network development. I worked in a US based company, where 95% of the employees spoke Spanish as their native language. My job was to run a small department within that company, but I didn’t speak Spanish. After the first day, I picked up a Spanish / English dictionary at a local bookstore.
My Spanish-speaking assistant wanted to learn English, and we helped each other during work, lunch, breaks, and after work. Within a year, we could both construct sentences in the other’s native language. We shared information about culture, music, and food.
As a result, we became good friends, worked in harmony, and we had a very productive department. Although my Spanish is a little “rusty” now, I still have an opportunity to speak it, every week, in my own company.
Just by taking the time to understand actions, culture, behavior, and a different viewpoint, you can cultivate influence. Developing influence shouldn’t be for self-centered reasons. It is best when used for the common good of a group.
The desire to consistently improve your life is one of your most fundamental needs. That feeling that comes from knowing that everyday you are becoming more is part of your nature. Knowing that you are affecting and improving your environment through your own influence is immensely satisfying. It is a key ingredient in living a happy and fulfilled life. At some level we are al pursuing success of some sort. We are constantly looking for ways to have more, to be more and to gain more, thinking that once we “have it all” we will be happy and life will be perfect. Then, we can take it easy and relax and just enjoy life.
This way of thinking, this mindset, acts like a virus that can “kill” you. If not emotionally then spiritually. Our modern culture is filled with numerous examples of top achievers who seemingly have everything but they are deeply unhappy and constantly have to battle with the challenges within their own character. They fail to grasp the true purpose of success. From it’s latin origin, the word success actually means “to advance” or “to progress” which implies that success is not “something” you get at the end but a process that has very little to do with the end result. From this point of view success is what will improve your life as it is what moves you forward to a better experience of life.
In their pursuit of a greater quality of life most people loose sight of the real reason why they actually want to be successful in the first place. It is never the “things” but rather the way you believe these things will make you feel once you’ve got them. Your success will be either obtainable or sustainable. Most of your desires will be obtainable within your lifetime but this no guarantee that you will be happy and fulfilled. When you strive for collecting and accumulating “things” you will experience very little fulfilment as you will always rely on something external to give you the feelings that you want to experience inside you; feelings that you believe will come from having what you pursue.
The real purpose of a goal is never to obtain something of material value but rather the qualities that you will gain as a person in your pursuit of the goal. For you to have success that is sustainable you must develop a new mindset; a mindset that focuses not on what you must do to get what you want, but on what you must become to attract that which you want. What you become is what you get to keep. When you shift your focus to developing your character, you can start to use goals and success as a means to an end instead of it being the end-all and be-all of life. You start to distance yourself from the need to have “stuff” in order to feel that sense of joy and fulfilment.
Knowing that you can be successful is not enough. You want the experience of success. You that feeling of success as a part of who you are as a person; as part of your character. When your success is obtainable, when you are able to collect the things, then your experience of success rarely lasts very long. There is no consistency in the experience. So often we see amazing success stories of young achievers that reach their all their goals in a short period of time, only to break down emotionally soon after. The reason is that they haven’t learned the key to lasting success which is the ability to create success in your life that is sustainable. Sustainable success is inexhaustible. It is consistent and takes care of itself. With the qualities and attributes that you learned through the experience of pursuing your goal you are able to re-create any achievement as you are the source.
The concept of obtainable and sustainable success is best illustrated with Aesop’s fable of the Goose and the Golden Egg. The goose as the source of the gold could consistently produce the gold, but the farmer out of his impatience and ignorance wanted it all and he wanted it now. So, he cut open the goose only to find out that there is nothing. The moral of the story is that you should nurture and develop yourself in order to sustain your happiness and success. If your focus is just on obtaining goals you will not get any more “golden eggs” as the real value is in what you become and how that makes you feel.
You can either obtain success or you can become it. The objective is the same but the mindset is very different. You can either get the “things” that will make you feel successful or you can become the source of your own success and fulfilment. You want lasting results and this will only come from your ability to create and re-create, on demand, that what you whish to experience during your time on earth. Adopting the mentality of creating lasting success, of becoming sustainable, starts with realizing that true success comes from giving and not getting. In the giving lies the “getting” in that what you give away is what you get to experience and your experience is what you get to keep forever. Ultimately, to sustain anything you must give and receive for this is the very nature of growth and life itself. Success is a feeling and in making that feeling part of who you are, you will never be without success and you will never be left wanting anything outside of you.
Let go of your need to obtain “stuff” and focus on the experience of life and the emotional content of your life. Improve yourself by pursuing goals that will make of you the kind of person that manifest that which you want most. That which you obtain will eventually disappear and loose its value. That which you sustain will grow and expand and continue to increase the quality of your magnificent life. Obtainable success is static and like anything in nature that does not grow it will eventually die.
Get ready for a golden idea that will accelerate your personal success beyond your imagination.
Are you like most of people who may sit with themselves and define their strengths and weaknesses?
And after that you start developing a plan to improve your weaknesses to become a better person.
And while applying your plan, you face a lot of difficulties and you might surrender with the excuse that it is a habit that can’t be changed.
If you are like those people, then accept my apology: you are limiting your chances of success and putting yourself in a great struggle.
By following that method you are wasting time and effort and you are far beyond the fast track to ultimate personal success.
Now forget about that method and let me give you the golden idea to accelerate your personal success:
“Focus 80% of your time and energy building and improving your strengths and focus the remaining 20% on improving you weaknesses”.
Don’t say it is strange because your strengths will become weaknesses if you left them without continuous improvement.
Your strength will decrease fast while your weakness may improve slowly and you will end up being a “middle” person with no unique talent or value.
To be a person of value you have to focus on your uniqueness and special talent. Develop it, improve it, and the most important thing is: use it, use it and use it.
Forget about your weaknesses; no body is perfect. And focus on your strengths. Focus on the unique value you have more than anyone else.
If you do that you will accelerate your personal success and become a person of great value.
Build on your talents and strengths and don’t give much attention to your weaknesses. No body is perfect.
Again, here is the golden idea for accelerating personal success:
“Focus 80% of your time and energy building and improving your strengths and focus the remaining 20% on improving you weaknesses”.
My friend, you can make a difference.
We are always living – seems obvious but many people seem to go through most of their life on autopilot. Sure they have hopes and dreams, they have ideas and plans, yet few actually achieve them. With every second that passes we lose time given to us to accomplish and experience various things. Not many people around the world can afford to sit in front of a computer and read articles like this compelling them to live life on purpose. They have a clear purpose – survival. They are not dreaming of riches or retirement, they are hoping to survive another day.
This is not a guilt trip, we are extremely blessed to be living in North America or some other developed nation where opportunities abound. But to whom much is given, much is expected. It is your duty to succeed, and despite the challenges you have faced, they are by no means an excuse.
I grew up in a third world country, and have many relatives who would be thrilled to be offered the chance to live in North America. They do what they can to get by, feed their families, raise their kids – not unlike us over here… but they have very little to aspire in the way of opportunity. In North America, we can aspire to the heights of society, finance, status, fame, etc and with hard work and some help, we can achieve it in our lifetime as a select few have. Sure its slim, but the chance exists.
I feel a responsibility to make the most of my life. Do you? What would a successful life look like to you? Try exploring your dreams beyond the typical riches and faming dream. John Maxwell says “Success is knowing your purpose, growing to reach your maximum potential and sowing seeds that benefit others.”
My definition of success is actively closing the gap between whom you are now and who God purposed you to be. The big question is, “What is your purpose?”
Here are some foundational principles on purpose, that apply to any created or invented things or being.
1. Everything is life has a purpose
2. Not every purpose is known
3. If you don’t know the purpose of a thing, you will abuse it. (E.g. a surgeon’s scalpel can be used to save or take a life.)
4. If you want to know the purpose of a thing, never ask the things.
5. The purpose of a thing is only found in the mind of the maker of that thing.
Only the original manufacturer of a car can know the full purpose of the car and each of its components. Only they know the potential and can give correct directions of use. Everyone else is guessing. You won’t find a Ford Manual in a Toyota Car, neither could you get one to fix the other’s product. (Without voiding the warranty and performance guarantee!)
Purpose while it may seem obvious is actually hard to pin down. Myles Munroe has put it best:
Purpose is the original intent for the reason of the making of a thing.
Purpose is what caused the maker to make something.
Purpose is what was wanted, that made a maker make a thing.
What a maker made was created to produce what he wanted. What he wanted was purpose, what he made was product. Product comes after purpose and product is created to produce purpose. I know its heavy – but its true.
E.g. Man wanted an easy way to light fire (purpose), so he invented matches (product)
The fact that you exist implies that there was a purpose behind your creation. No, it wasn’t an accident (no matter how you were conceived) and your success in life is determined, not by how much you make or spend, or what people may say. Success in this life is determined by whether you have fulfilled your purpose, and every second that goes by ought to be spent in the pursuit of that purpose.
In fact succeeding is not so much about achieving, but being on the journey towards what we were born to do… Challenge yourself to live a life of purpose. Seek out that purpose – only your Maker can reveal that – don’t let people put you in a box! Always Live your Life on Purpose!.
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